Flexing Is Easy As Pie

Have you ever looked at a pie—the crisp and flaky, golden, buttery crust—and wondered what juicy fruit filling was inside. Hmmm . . . is it an incredible sour cherry filling, fresh summer peaches, lightly spiced sweet apples, or maybe my favorite—a tart strawberry rhubarb? Then you notice the sugar crystals sparkling on top. Nice! Excellent observation skills are critical for improving your sales performance. Have you ever stopped to observe people like you would a freshly baked pie?

Personality versus Social Style 

People, like pie crust, have observable behaviors on the outside—what we say and do is on the outside like crust. Our personalities are on the inside, like filling. Social Style™ includes actions that others can observe about us and describe as our behavior—that is, what we say (verbal) and do (nonverbal).

Below is a simple and effective three-step framework to use observable behaviors to gain critical insights you need to sell anything to anyone or manage even the most demanding clients.

Three Easy Steps to Learn, Remember, and Apply

1.  Observe: Behaviors that can be observed include what we say and do:

-Quiet or loud  

-Slow or fast paced

-More or less voice inflection 

-Facially controlled or animated

-More or less eye contact

-Casual or rigid posture

-Leaning forward or back

2.  Identify: The Social Style™ Model gives us a way to identify behavior preferences and organizes the information using two dimensions. One dimension of behavior measures the degree to which others tend to ask or tell, and the other measures if they tend to control or emote.

There is no good, bad, or best. Social Style™ is built on a four-quadrant matrix:

•   Analytical = More controlling + asking: a thinker who needs to be right
•   Driving = More controlling + telling: an action-oriented person who needs results
•   Expressive = More emoting + telling: a spontaneous person who needs recognition
•   Amiable = More emoting + asking: a person who needs security and relationships

3.  Flex: Flexing is the ability to recognize others’ work preferences and adjust to them. Flexing your style improves your versatility; high versatility means you build better relationships.  Flex your style:

•   Analytical: Decide and be decisive with data 
•   Driving:  Listen and acknowledge different points of view
•   Amiable: Declare and let people know what you think
•   Expressive: Restrain, check, and think before you speak  

Use these three steps to improve your sales performance and your relationships by learning how to observe and identify others’ social styles (what they say and do) and modify your behaviors to communicate more efficiently and effectively.

Here’s to selling Mastery. 

-Cherilynn

Head of Education and Growth, Sistas In Sales

Executive Coach/Managing Partner, CGI

Cherilynn Castleman, Executive Coach/Sales Trainer, has been a sales executive for 20+ years. With a natural talent for teaching and a drive to sell, Cherilynn uses her skills to coach and train other executives and sales professionals.

“You don’t make progress by standing on the sidelines, whimpering and complaining.  You make progress by implementing ideas.” – Shirley Chisholm

Shirley Anita Chisholm was an educator, author, and the first black woman elected to the United States Congress.